Use a lubricant that is water-soluble before penetration (e.g., Liquid K-Y®, Astroglide®, Slippery Stuff®). If you find that these lubricants irritate you or dry out during intercourse, a pure vegetable oil (such as Crisco®, solid or oil) has no chemicals and is also water-soluble. Please note that Crisco® is not latex-friendly and therefore should not be used in combination with condoms.
A topical anesthetic (for example, Xylocaine®) may help before intercourse; discuss this with your doctor and ensure that you know how, where, and when to apply it.
To relieve burning and irritation after intercourse, take cool or lukewarm sitz or baking soda baths (4-5 tablespoons, 1-3 times a day for 10 minutes each).
Apply ice or a frozen blue gel pack wrapped in one layer of a hand towel to relieve burning after intercourse. Other ideas include a bag of frozen peas, or fill a dish-soap bottle with water and freeze it; these fit well against the vulva.
Urinate (to prevent infection) and rinse the vulva with cool water after sexual intercourse.